Love Yourself Into Feeling And Looking Better & Why Extreme Crash Diets Or Lifestyle Modifications Don’t Work Long Term

Barbara Wicks
January is a month when many women make resolutions to be healthier and lose weight. 

And while those goals can propel us towards feeling better, they can also be counterproductive if coming from the place of guilt, shame or wanting to keep up with others, rather than our wish to experience the best of what life has to offer and while also knowing that we are already enough as we are right now.

Let’s look at weight loss for example.

It is customary for many women to sign up for gym membership or various slimming clubs such a Weight Watchers or Slimming World this time of the year and often go from not being very active at all, to doing several exercise sessions a week and restricting their calorific intake quite a lot in order to encourage faster weight loss. And while both of those actions can be very positive in principle if carried out correctly, when we go about them in a wrong way, they can cause us more harm than be of help long term.

First of all, many of the slimming clubs rely quite heavily on ready-made meal replacements, which although calorie and macro nutrient balanced, are unlikely to have the same nutritional benefits that eating fresh meals or naturally derived superfoods would have. So it’s not uncommon for women who follow very restrictive and low calorie diets long term to develop nutritional deficiencies, which in turn can adversely affect their health in a number of ways.

Secondly, some of the meal replacements contain ingredients which can be harmful to our health, such as artificial sweeteners, many of which are carcinogenic, or anti-nutrients such as soy – which can affect both thyroid health and fertility in a negative way if consumed in excess and in its un-fermented form.

And thirdly, limiting our food intake drastically, while also increasing cardiovascular activity quite a lot at the same time, can lead to adrenal burnout. This is especially true for women who are already under a lot of daily stress in their lives, as the intensive exercise is likely to raise their cortisol levels, which are likely already elevated, even higher.

At the same time, such drastic food restrictions can also cause the slowing down of metabolism, as the body gets tricked into believing it’s famine season, so starts preserving already scarce resources for the rainy day, by making you burn your food at a slower rate. Which is obviously completely counterproductive to the goal you are trying to achieve.

And if you are very unlucky, it can also mess up your hormonal health and fertility, as a nature’s way of preventing pregnancy with what is perceived as not enough resources to maintain it long term.

So now that you know why crash dieting and killing yourself on the treadmill is not really that good for you long term, what can you do to get closer to your weight loss goals? 

Some of the simple strategies that you can put in place straight away include but are not limited to: 

  • 1) Getting enough sleep, as deficiencies in sleep are linked to an elevated level of a hormone responsible for increased hunger called ghrelin
  • 2) Tweaking the timing of your largest meal to fall around midday, when metabolism is at its strongest and we are also most active, therefore require more calories to operate in the most optimal way

  • 3) Making sure that at least some of the exercise / body movement you engage in encourages relaxation of the nervous system in order to reduce your cortisol levels

What gives me an authority to speak on such subjects, you might ask? 
As someone who used to be an emotional eater in my 20s and 30s and who also used various slimming supplements earlier on in life, I have experienced first hand what it is like to be out of control with my eating habits, even despite relatively good foundations in that area in my childhood. 

As I went through life and qualified as a nutritional therapist first in 2006, and then studied counselling, as well as psychology of eating in later years, I also realised that a lot of commonly given advice about weight loss is incorrect and can have many women locked in a perpetual cycle of yoyo dieting. 

Which is why anyone wanting to embark on a weight optimisation journey needs to start asking questions not just about what and how to do it, but also why certain things are or are not happening for them. And those things can include emotional factors as well, by the way.

If you are tired of guesswork, or doing the things you were told to do and still not getting anywhere, why not give yourself a bit of a leg up and book a no obligation Zoom chat with me. 

In our 30 minutes together, I will ask you about your most burning health concern and explain how working with me might benefit you, should we be a good match.

To book your free Zoom call, just follow the link to my online calendar below:

https://lnkd.in/ekSxe_cY

I am really looking forward to connecting with you and being of service.
by Barbara Wicks 6 January 2025
Once we get to a certain age majority, if not all of us, get to realise there are certain events in life that are completely out of our control. And that oftentimes no amount of wishful thinking or trying harder can influence the final outcomes of the situations in question. This is particularly true about serious illness and death of our family members, partners or close friends; falling apart of family or intimate relationships – often resulting in divorce, parental alienation or disintegration of close family bonds, or even things such as redundancy, change of career, ageing and our own chronic health struggles. Majority of the events I mentioned above have been listed extremely high on the stress level score, with death of a spouse ranked at 100 points, death of a close family member at 63 points and divorce at equally high 75 points. But while we can’t wish away many of those highly stressful situations out of our lives, we still have control over how we look after ourselves in the aftermath of them occurring. This is of crucial importance given the fact that chronic stress is a real epidemic of the 21st century and something that is one of major contributing factors in the development of a vast number of physical, emotional and mental health problems. Having experienced divorce and subsequent parental alienation, chronic fatigue and depression in the past and recently also death of a parent, I know very well how devastating all those events can be, both to our identity as well as our health. Luckily, even at the darkest of times we can choose to protect our future health and wellbeing by making certain health and lifestyle choices that can facilitate and speed up the healing process, as well as safeguard us from developing additional health problems or negative coping mechanisms further down the line. So, with that in mind, I wanted to offer you some of the things that helped me personally when I was really struggling, but which also proved invaluable to my past nutrition and health coaching clients. 10 Things To Consider When Going Through Difficult Life Changes 1) Prioritise sleep and rest. 2) Allow yourself to feel all your emotions and get some help with processing them if struggling to do so on your own. 3) Use daily journaling to identify your struggles. 4) Use mindfulness practices and / or spirituality to help you come to terms with the things you are unable to change or let go of yet. 5) Set firm boundaries around your personal time and availability to support others while you are still healing – this is particularly important for people pleasers and recovering people pleasers. 6) Avoid additional radical changes to your lifestyle, diet or routine in the early days - as they might end up proving extra stressors to your already struggling nervous and immune systems. 7) Try to do something pleasurable for yourself on daily basis – even if it might be as simple as a hot bath, a soothing cup of tea, wrapping yourself in a warm blanket and listening to relaxing music or something similar. 8) Avoid excess sugar, caffeine or alcohol intake as much as possible – as all of those can truly wreak havoc with our mood, energy levels, motivation and brain power if consumed in large quantities over long periods of time. If you are struggling with that, optimising your diet and including the right supplements and superfoods can be incredibly helpful in curbing your cravings for the above-mentioned substances or, in some cases, even eliminating those cravings completely. 9) Cut yourself some slack when failing to achieve your previous lifestyle, health, energy or dietary goals in the timeline you had in mind originally. Remember that healing is a very complex and gradual process and one that also requires a lot of energy. So don’t punish yourself with excessive criticism, shame or feeling of inadequacy if your body and mind decide they need more time to get back in balance. 10) Above all, remember that as long as there is life, there is also hope. We are not victims of our circumstances and we have the power to choose what to do with the cards that life dealt us, even in some extremely difficult situations. Because like Pema Chödrön famously said: You are the sky. Everything else is just the weather. About Barbara "My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humour, and some style," said Maya Angelou. I embrace that life philosophy wholeheartedly too and try to encourage my clients to do the same. Take Action Now Don't let another day go by feeling less than your best. Book your complimentary 30 minute Zoom chat today and take the first step towards a healthier, happier you. During our session, we'll: discuss your current health challenges and goals explore how Reclaim Your Radiance method can support your energy levels and general wellbeing outline potential strategies tailored to your unique needs answer any questions you have about the way I work To schedule your free consultation, simply direct message me with your preferred dates and times, so that I can check my availability and book you in or send you an up to date link to my online diary.
by Barbara Wicks 27 November 2024
I will never forget the look of disbelief on so many clients’ faces in the past when I would suggest switching up their usual breakfast fare of cold cereal or toast and coffee during the colder parts of the year to something more warming and substantial, such as a bowl of soup, for example. The usual reasons for not wanting to try something new that were given to me would be things such as: lack of time, not feeling very hungry first thing in the morning, preferring a sweet tasting breakfast and sometimes also the dislike of a change in the routine that had been there for many years in some cases. And while I acknowledge all those reasons as being valid and genuine, it can also be helpful to reframe our way of thinking by reminding ourselves that if we are not getting the health and vitality outcomes we want to achieve by doing the things we have always done, maybe it’s time to test some new lifestyle and eating routines and solutions. Including, perhaps, a new take on what to have for breakfast. To put things in perspective for you even more, modern Western idea of what breakfast should be like is mainly the result of decades of conditioning by TV commercials, magazine advertising and commercial interests of many companies selling those breakfast cereals. All of which profit from the fact we eat as many of those products for as long as possible - without ever questioning the effect they might have on our health long term. In contrast to the meagre and nutritionally poor cold cereal breakfast, traditional hearty breakfast that we still see consumed in many other places all over the world is an acknowledgement of the fact that we need to eat and get sufficient energy from our food at the time when we are likely to be most active, i.e. during the early part of the day. So how do we reconcile our often-frantic mornings with the need to nourish ourselves better for the tasks that lie ahead? The answer, as with many other similar dilemmas, often lies in preparation and planning. Some of the things that you might find helpful would be: Sticking to dishes that are already made and just need a quick reheating – soups and Spanish omelettes are particularly good for that Utilising cooked grains stored in the fridge such as millet, quinoa or rice and reheating them with a splash of milk (regular or healthy non-dairy alternatives) as well as topping them up with chopped nuts, seeds, fruit and a bit of spice for a more nutritionally rounded and filling breakfast cereal alternative Adding some boiled or scrambled eggs, avocado, tinned sardines or smoked mackerel to that breakfast toast if you absolutely insist on having one If you are absolutely stuck for time, putting your warm breakfast of choice in a suitable food flask and eating it as soon as possible - making sure to have a hot drink and handful of nuts, a good quality protein bar or something similar before leaving the house Note: If your drink of choice first thing in the morning is coffee, try not to have it on empty stomach, as it is likely to wreak havoc with your blood sugar levels, as I have seen many times in the past while working with diabetic and pre-diabetic clients. Swapping your old breakfast routine for something new doesn’t have to daunting if you approach it strategically – like you would a tricky work-related task that needs addressing. You just need to remember your why for doing so – increased energy and brain power, and less reliance of caffeine, sugar and junk foods as a reward for your bravery in breaking the old eating habits. To get you inspired to ring some changes, here is an idea for a quick quinoa-based breakfast dish I made today, which was loosely based on a principle of Bircher muesli and prepared using the current content of my fridge and kitchen cupboards. Bircher Style Warm Quinoa Medley Serves 2 ½ cup uncooked quinoa (which makes 1 cup of ready cooked quinoa after being cooked with 1 cup of water until all the water evaporated) ½ large or 1 small pomegranate – seeds only 6 tsp of sesame seeds 2 apples, cored and chopped into small chunks 12 dried apricots – chopped finely 40 nuts chopped – I used hazelnuts and almonds ½ cup of warm coconut milk (or your milk of choice) a sprinkling of cinnamon 2 drops of Doterra vanilla oil (optional but really yummy and healthy) Method: 1) Warm through the quinoa with your milk of choice 2) Ladle the quinoa up in into bowls and top up with chopped apple, pomegranate seeds, sesame seeds and nuts 3) Sprinkle with cinnamon and vanilla oil, mix it all together and enjoy Next Steps If you want to explore more ways to elevate your energy and performance through nutritional therapy, mindful nutrition, mindset practices, lifestyle modification and EFT, all of which are part of my Reclaim Your Radiance Method, why not connect with me and create a personalised plan that honours both your physical and emotional wellbeing, as well as your professional demands. Simply direct message me for a link to my online calendar and book a complimentary Zoom discovery session to find out how I might be able to help you step on your path to greater radiance, vitality and health a lot faster and with more ease. Here is to more joy, brain power, energy and radiant health in your life!
by Barbara Wicks 30 September 2024
As a busy woman constantly juggling the demands of your career and personal life, you're intimately familiar with the toll it can take on your mental well-being. Fatigue, low mood, lack of motivation, and brain fog can become unwanted companions, leaving you feeling less than your best self. But what if I told you that in many cases the solution to boosting your mood and mental clarity could be as simple as tweaking your diet? Recent research has shed light on the powerful connection between the foods we eat and our risk of developing depression, offering an empowering and practical approach to supporting your mental health. The Gut-Brain Connection Unveiled For years, scientists have been exploring the intricate relationship between the gut and brain, which is known as the gut-brain axis. This bi-directional communication pathway involves an interplay of numerous factors, including the gut microbiome, immune system, and various metabolic processes. In a ground-breaking study published in Nature Microbiology, researchers found that individuals with depression had significantly different gut microbiome compositions compared to those without depression. Specifically, they observed an increased presence of certain bacteria linked to inflammation and a decrease in bacteria known for producing compounds that support brain health. The Anti-Inflammatory Diet: A Potential Game-Changer Chronic inflammation has long been associated with an increased risk of depression and other mental health issues. In light of the gut-brain connection, researchers have turned their attention to the anti-inflammatory potential of certain foods and their impact on depressive symptoms. A recent meta-analysis published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition examined data from numerous studies and found that adhering to an anti-inflammatory diet rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and healthy fats (such as those found in fatty fish and nuts) was associated with a lower risk of developing depression. The Power of Probiotics and Prebiotics As our understanding of the gut microbiome deepens, researchers are also exploring the potential of probiotics and prebiotics in supporting mental well-being. Probiotics, the beneficial bacteria found in fermented foods like yogurt, kefir, and sauerkraut, have been shown to positively influence mood and cognitive function. In a ground-breaking study published in the journal Gastroenterology, researchers found that individuals with depression who consumed a probiotic supplement experienced a significant reduction in depressive symptoms compared to those who received a placebo. Additionally, prebiotics – the fibre-rich compounds found in foods like onions, garlic, and bananas – act as fuel for the beneficial bacteria in your gut, promoting a diverse and thriving microbiome, which has been linked to better mental health outcomes. Putting it All Together: A Holistic Approach While the latest research highlights the potential benefits of certain foods in fighting depression, it's important to remember that nutrition is just one piece of the puzzle. A holistic approach that incorporates regular exercise, stress management techniques, adequate sleep, and social connections is essential for optimal mental well-being. By nourishing your body and mind with a balanced diet rich in anti-inflammatory, probiotic, and prebiotic-rich foods, and adopting a lifestyle that supports your overall well-being, you can empower yourself to overcome the challenges of depression and thrive in your demanding career. References: Valles-Colomer, M., Falony, G., Darzi, Y., Tigchelaar, E. F., Wang, J., Tito, R. Y., ... & Raes, J. (2019). The neuroactive potential of the human gut microbiota in quality of life and depression. Nature microbiology, 4(4), 623-632. Lassale, C., Batty, G. D., Baghdadli, A., Jacka, F., Sánchez-Villegas, A., Kivimäki, M., & Akbaraly, T. (2019). Healthy dietary indices and risk of depressive outcomes: a systematic review and meta-analysis of observational studies. Molecular psychiatry, 24(7), 965-986. Akkasheh, G., Kashani-Poor, Z., Tajabadi-Ebrahimi, M., Jafari, P., Akbari, H., Taghizadeh, M., ... & Esmaillzadeh, A. (2016). Clinical and metabolic response to probiotic administration in patients with major depressive disorder: A randomized, double-blind, placebo-controlled trial. Nutrition, 32(3), 315-320. Liu, R. T., Walsh, R. F., & Sheehan, A. E. (2019). Prebiotics and probiotics for depression and anxiety: A systematic review and meta-analysis of controlled clinical trials. Neuroscience & Biobehavioral Reviews, 102, 13-23. About Barbara "My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humour, and some style," said Maya Angelou. I embrace that life philosophy wholeheartedly too and try to encourage my clients to do the same. Take Action Now! Don't let another day go by feeling less than your best. Book your complimentary Zoom chat today and take the first step towards a healthier, happier you. During our session, we'll: discuss your current health challenges and goals explore how nutrition and lifestyle changes can support your mental wellness outline potential strategies tailored to your unique needs answer any questions you have about the mind-body connection To schedule your free consultation, simply click the link below, or direct message me with your preferred dates and times, so that I can check my availability and book you in. Book Your Complimentary Zoom Chat Here!
by Barbara Wicks 26 August 2024
As we are getting close to the middle of Bank Holiday weekend and some extra time off work for many of us, it seems fitting to contemplate a question that often lingers in the back of our minds: What is our true purpose for being here? Moreover, how does our understanding (or lack thereof) of this purpose influence our daily levels of motivation, joy, and resilience in the face of life's inevitable challenges? Interestingly, yesterday marked the birthday of Paulo Coelho, the acclaimed Brazilian author known for his profound philosophical insights. While his work may not resonate with everyone, particularly those who pride themselves on pragmatism, there's an undeniable truth in his writings that speaks to the human condition. As social beings, we are inherently driven to forge meaningful connections with others, be it through friendships, family bonds, or romantic partnerships. These relationships not only enrich our lives but also provide a deeper sense of purpose and meaning to our daily endeavours. This truth becomes particularly poignant when we consider the insights shared by those working in palliative care or with the elderly. A common thread in end-of-life reflections is the regret of not having spent enough quality time with loved ones or expressing affection to those who mattered most. These revelations underscore the importance of nurturing our relationships throughout our lives, not just in our later years. However, we need not wait for a life-altering moment to embrace this wisdom. This weekend presents an opportune time to reflect on the relationships in our lives that may have been neglected due to the demands of modern living. Consider creating a list of individuals who have played significant roles in your life but with whom you've lost touch. Once compiled, challenge yourself to reach out to one or more of these people. Rekindling these connections can bring mutual joy, support, and a renewed sense of purpose. Because sharing life's experiences – both triumphs and tribulations – often makes our journey here a lot more meaningful and fulfilling. For those who find themselves without such connections, take heart. Sometimes, the simplest gestures can open doors to new relationships. A genuine smile or a kind word to a stranger might be the catalyst for a meaningful interaction or, at the very least, a moment of human warmth in someone's day. As we navigate the complexities of our daily lives, it's crucial to remember that our purpose often intertwines with the lives we touch and the connections we nurture. By actively seeking and maintaining these relationships, we can enhance our motivation, increase our capacity for joy, and build resilience against life's inevitable challenges. This Bank Holiday weekend, as you go about your activities, consider how you might strengthen your existing relationships or forge new ones. In doing so, you may find yourself one step closer to understanding your true purpose and experiencing a more fulfilling life. Wishing you a weekend filled with meaningful connections and renewed bonds! About Barbara: My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humour, and some style” said Maya Angelou. I embrace that life philosophy wholeheartedly too and try to encourage my clients to do the same. I have a particular interest and expertise in working with digestive health, immunity, stress, and low energy concerns. And after recovering from chronic fatigue and depression in the past, I now guide burnt out high flying female executives and overwhelmed female business owners on their journey back towards better health and renewed zest for life using my signature Reclaim Your Radiance Method.
by Barbara Wicks 19 August 2024
Introduction When I first came across the book "The Courage to Be Disliked" by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga, I was naturally drawn to it because of its title. As someone who still refers to myself as a recovering people pleaser, the concept immediately resonated with me. And after reading the summary and realising that the main premise of the book is based on the principles of Adlerian individual psychology, it made even more sense that I was intuitively drawn to it. My connection to Adlerian psychology runs deep. I trained as an Adlerian counsellor for two years back in 2013 and fell in love with how Adler's work and philosophy on life was helping others make sense of themselves, the world, and the often complex and perplexing interpersonal relationships we form throughout our lives. Although I didn't complete my counselling qualification due to serious health issues and some major personal challenges I was experiencing at the time, the principles I learned during that training have been invaluable in both my personal and professional life ever since. Book Summary "The Courage to Be Disliked" presents its wisdom through a dialogue between a philosopher and a young person, exploring key concepts from Alfred Adler's theories. The book challenges readers to reconsider their perspectives on life, relationships, and personal growth. Some of the main ideas include: the importance of accepting oneself and having the courage to be disliked by others the concept that past experiences don't determine one's future the idea that all problems are interpersonal relationship problems the significance of contributing to others and the community the notion that happiness is a choice and comes from within One quote from the book that particularly stands out for me is: "The courage to be happy also includes the courage to be disliked. When you have gained that courage, your interpersonal relationships will all at once change into things of lightness." Applying The Principles From "Courage To Be Disliked" To Overcome Anxiety and People-Pleasing For those struggling with anxiety, people-pleasing tendencies or other mood disorders, the principles outlined in "The Courage to Be Disliked" can be transformative. Here's how: Liberating Yourself from Others' Opinions: By cultivating the courage to be disliked, you free yourself from the exhausting task of trying to please everyone. This shift allows you to focus on your own values and desires, leading to more authentic relationships and a stronger sense of self. Embracing Authenticity: When you're no longer consumed by the need for universal approval, you can start living more authentically. This authenticity is a powerful antidote to anxiety and depression, fostering a sense of purpose and fulfilment that no amount of external validation can provide. Setting Healthy Boundaries: The courage to be disliked empowers you to set and maintain healthy boundaries. For those prone to people-pleasing, this can be revolutionary. By prioritizing your own needs and learning to say "no" when necessary, you create space for genuine self-care and reduce the likelihood of burnout. Redefining Success: When you're willing t o be disliked, you can redefine success on your own terms. This shift in perspective can alleviate the pressure to meet others' standards and allow you to celebrate your unique journey. Fostering Resilience: Developing the courage to be disliked builds resilience. Each time you stay true to yourself despite potential disapproval, you strengthen your ability to weather life's challenges. Lightening Your Relationships: As the quote suggests, when you gain the courage to be disliked, your relationships become lighter. You'll find yourself surrounded by people who appreciate you for who you are, not for who they want you to be. Embracing Growth and Change: The courage to be disliked opens the door to personal growth. It allows you to take risks, try new things, and learn from failures without the crippling fear of judgment. Personal Reflection In my own journey, I've found that incorporating these Adlerian principles has been transformative. As a recovering people pleaser, I've learned to prioritise my own needs and values, leading to more authentic and fulfilling relationships. I've also found that sharing these concepts with others – both in professional settings and personal interactions – has helped many people gain a new perspective on their struggles with anxiety and self-doubt. The path to cultivating the courage to be disliked is ongoing. It requires patience, self-compassion, and a willingness to challenge deeply ingrained beliefs and behaviours. But the rewards – a lighter spirit, more genuine connections, as well as a stronger sense of self – are immeasurable. For those struggling with anxiety, people-pleasing tendencies or other mood disorders, I encourage you to explore these principles. Whether through reading "The Courage to Be Disliked," or simply starting to question your need for universal approval, taking steps towards authenticity can lead to a more grounded, confident and ultimately happier life. Remember, the journey to self-acceptance and the courage to be disliked is just that – a journey. Be patient with yourself, celebrate small victories, and know that each step to wards authenticity is a step towards a lighter, more fulfilling life.
by Barbara Wicks 3 July 2024
As someone who lost a year of life to staying in bed with FATIGUE, MUSCLE PAIN, DEPRESSION and COMPLETE BRAIN FOG back in 2015, I can relate to and have empathy for anyone suffering with seemingly unrelated health problems, which can make effective day to day functioning impossible. My problems started after 3 years of severe emotional stress and 2 viral infections in 2014 – both factors being common causes for the onset of chronic fatigue in many people. Thanks to my training in nutrition and holistic health and perseverance with emotional healing over the years, I am happy to say that I have managed to heal CFS and am about 80 percent recovered now, with some relapses still happening occasionally, but being very rare in general. So What Is Chronic Fatigue Syndrome / CFS? The name itself has been banded around so much over the last few years, yet I still feel like many people don’t fully understand the implications of what is involved in it. Typically, a diagnosis of chronic fatigue might be considered: In a person with SEVERE FATIGUE THAT PERSISTS OR RELAPSES FOR 6 MONTHS AND 4 OF THE FOLLOWING SYMPTOMS ALSO PRESENT: ➡️ impaired memory or concentration ➡️ multi joint pain ➡️ sore throat ➡️ new headaches ➡️ tender cervical or axillary nodes ➡️ unrefreshing sleep ➡️ muscle pain ➡️ post-exertional malaise The fatigue is severe, of new or definite onset and: ➡️ is not alleviated by rest ➡️ results in substantial reduction in occupational, educational or personal activities CONVENTIONAL MEDICINE will often tell us that we can only manage and minimise the symptoms of chronic fatigue at best ⬇️ by using lifestyle modifications and stress reduction as the main tools, as there is no known medication to take that would effectively get rid of the symptoms altogether. HOLISTIC APPROACHES, on the other hand, tend to be more successful in bringing about lasting improvement, as they will most likely also include and address factors such as: ⭐ diet – including potential food allergies and nutritional deficiencies ⭐ gut imbalances and parasitic infections ⭐ potential hormonal imbalances ⭐ lowered immunity ⭐ environmental factors ⭐ emotional stressors If unaddressed, all of the factors above can be contributing to the worsening of chronic fatigue at times, or people suffering with it not being able to heal and recover at all. If you: ➡️ recognise yourself in the description above ➡️ would like to know how my 3 months health coaching programme using the Reclaim Your Radiance With Barbara method could help you start addressing some of those root causes of persistent and unrelenting tiredness, whether it is labelled as chronic fatigue or not ⬇️ why not book a complimentary Zoom chat with me to discuss your concerns and find out about how I would plan to address them if working together. https://calendly.com/insideoutradianceappointments/free-30-minute-discovery-call?month=2024-08 With Radiant Blessings Barbara Inside Out Radiance Health Coac h
by Barbara Wicks 11 June 2024
This may sound like a bit of a controversial statement in the world where we are all being encouraged to be more tolerant and understanding of one another, as well as our differences and struggles. But the key to understanding what I meant by saying the above lies in the difference between two quite similar yet distinct concepts, i.e. empathy and compassion, which unfortunately tend to get used interchangeably a lot of the time. As someone who used to pride herself on being an empath and a people’s person, I came to understand the price we pay for excessive or misplaced empathy all too well throughout my earlier years, when I would be often severely and disproportionately affected by other people’s low moods, bad temper, mental health issues or general life struggles. And I used to allow some of those things to spill over into my own emotional and energy field, the way many highly sensitive people do before they learnt about making and maintaining their energetic boundaries. So, as you can see from the example above, empathy can be perceived to be “an involuntary breach of individual separateness”, as philosopher Susanne Langer once aptly named it and as such be quite bad for our physical and emotional health. And this seems to apply particularly when we observe someone suffering, such as a loved one. Furthermore, brain scan studies by neuroscientist Tania Singer of the Max Planck Society in Germany have demonstrated that when participants watched others in pain, their brain activity in the regions associated with pain was partially mirrored, which may be an evolutionary adaptation to help us predict, and avoid, how pain would affect us. So what we are being encouraged to do instead of feeling empathy or “feeling into others”, is fostering our ability to feel compassion, which is understood and described as “a feeling of concern for another person’s suffering which is accompanied by the motivation to help” according to Tania Singer. Another well known example of illustrating the difference between empathy and compassion is using the metaphor of trying to help someone stuck in a deep hole by extending a rope to them from above (i.e. compassion) and resisting the urge to climb into the hole with them for comfort and company (i.e. empathy). So, next time you find yourself feeling exhausted by being a highly sensitive person, try to practice establishing stronger energetic boundaries. And remember that you can help others much better from a place of being balanced and not emotionally enmeshed in their struggles. #recoveryfromchronicfatigue# #bettermoodsolutions# #holisticnutritionist# #dynamiceatingpsychology# With radiant blessings Barbara Inside Out Radiance Health Coach
by Barbara Wicks 6 June 2024
I came across the concept of “The 4 Agreements” by Don Miquel Ruiz quite a long time ago. And I initially read the principles with interest, but also as another pearl of wisdom and common sense in the vast sea of personal development advice that is available to us these days. However, for one reason or another, this information has been finding its way to me again recently on social media, so I decided to take another look, as I don’t believe there are such things as coincidences in life. And very fittingly, those concepts appear to be speaking to my journey of a recovering people pleaser that I have been on for the last few years, as a reminder and an affirmation not to take everything to heart and so personally. According to the publisher of the book, Janet Mills, “The Four Agreements replace conflict, drama, and needless emotional suffering with happiness, personal freedom, love, and respect for one’s “self” and all life.” The teachings are derived from the principles going back to the ancient Mexican culture of Toltecs and they are based on the awareness of the illusory nature of reality and the realisation that what we perceive as reality, is merely collective, unconscious agreements of society. With the bottom line of that philosophy being the fact that we don’t see life as such, but what we do see is our own filter system composed of beliefs, expectations, agreements and assumptions. Those principles can be very useful to anyone aspiring to live their lives in a conscious, honourable and honest way. However I also feel that for women who had had their physical or emotional health compromised in the past as a result of excessive people pleasing and inability to establish and maintain their own boundaries, they are essential signposts on how to conduct oneself in a way that is going to facilitate recovery and prevent future relapses. So my suggestion would be to have a look at each of those agreements when you find a peaceful and uninterrupted moment to yourself and reflect on whether they are already present in your life right now. And if they are not, have a think about how you could start implementing them in a way that would enhance your health, wellbeing, joy and ability to be unapologetically yourself, while also honouring other people’s life journeys. #recoveryfromchronicfatigue# #emotionalresilience# #holisticnutritionist# #dynamiceatingpsychology# With radiant blessings Barbara Reclaim Your Radiance Health Coach
by Barbara Wicks 31 May 2024
Have You Been Stuck In A Downward Spiral Pose? We all have days when it feels like the whole world is conspiring against us, and no, I don't mean what's been happening in the last few years, although the chaos and uncertainty of what's been unfolding certainly doesn't make life easy sometimes. What I meant was those moments when we feel like we are completely done: - out of power, - out if inspiration, - out of courage, - and out of desire to even try make anything better again. And it's all because of something that happened that triggered our sense of doom and gloom and put our nervous system in that fight-flight-freeze response yet again. And that something could have been an emotionally upsetting incident, or in case of someone who has been battling chronic health problems - a health scare or an accident that left them feeling powerless and out of control. If you have ever dwelt in one of those places, you will recognise its barren landscape - with no growth of any kind or even a slightest hint of sunlight appearing from behind the stormy skies. It's simply terrifying and you are desperate to leave it as soon as you can. And while it is not always possible to change the scenery around you at the click of your fingers, you still have some choices regarding what to do with the stones that have been thrown in your direction. By either continuing to trip over them, or using them to built a beautiful rockery with plants as tough as nails, that will withstand any kind of weather conditions. But before you do that, you must also remember to water yourself, as you are both the gardener and the most important plant in the garden of your life. And none of the other stuff can happen without your presence. So when you feel weary, discouraged and scared, nurture yourself as if you would a tender sapling: - give yourself nourishment and time required to grow stronger, - exercise patience - remember that growth is not an instantaneous process - find the kind of fertiliser that suits your individual needs And above all, always have faith in the miraculous power of nature and your own body to heal, restore and make you stronger. And maybe also try doing an upward facing dog and a sun salute as well - if that's your kind of thing. With radiant blessings Barbara Inside Out Radiance Health Coach
by Barbara Wicks 30 May 2024
What do you do when life hands you lemons? Do you make lemonade, gather some snacks, put flowers on the table and invite your friends for a garden party? Or do you hide inside till the storms of your life subside, which may or may not happen any time soon? I was invited to a garden party yesterday by a lovely friend in her late 70s, who is one of the bravest Parkinson warriors I have ever come across. And even despite her ongoing health struggles, she still manages to put a smile on her face, go out and take part in all sort of different activities and groups and even more importantly make the people around her feel like they matter, which is ultimately what we all want. She wasn't having the best day yesterday and had to retreat indoors for a little while, as was feeling weak and worn out. But rather than call it the day as far as the party was concerned, she let her friends lovingly support her through her low until she felt a bit better again. We can't always be fully in control of how our days pan put, especially when we live with a chronic or degenerative condition. But we can certainly take different measures to help ourselves recuperate and also find a supportive tribe of people who will be there for us holding the umbrella on those stormy and cloudy days. Have you found your tribe yet?